it could be the purpose of my life is to serve as a warning to others

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should I twist or stick? never an easy question to answer. if I twist, there is always the chance that i'll go bust. but if i stick, how can i improve my hand? then again, my life is not a game of poker and surely the only thing that I am now trying to 'win' is a slightly elusive sense of happiness. so what next? thats the $60K question for which I've been seeking an answer. rather than looking for pie in the sky solutions, i feel there is a better chance of finding a sense of happiness by making more of what i already have. 

today I sent in my letter of resignation to Joe Grooming. i am extremely proud of having created some of what i consider to be, Joe Grooming's greatest products. being responsible for building out the brand was, at times, a delightfully ambitious project that helped me grow as a maker. holding the title of Creative Director meant a great deal to me when things were messy in other parts of my life, but now... i realize that my desire to focus on important matters falls strictly within the walls of our house at 117 S 13th Street. the duross & langel brands (store - salon - grooming lounge) deserve no less than my full attention. what I value most fills the world sarah and i have created. having my family's support has always been an element in my life. sharing my day with the people in the house, and staying on track, is an amazing perk of the job.

my UK trip is now only hours away. as I slowly adjust my inner clock to GMT, i am pretty much useless to those around me. thankfully, there is enough love, understanding or respect to allow me to unspool as I set off into my holiday adventure. i intend to meet as many people who do what we do on a daily basis, be it salon, barber shop or small business. though there is no hope to achieve all i desire, i still hope to connect with like-minded people who are doing amazing things, and i hope to share that here in this blog and on social media.

some days i forget that life is a banquet, and that i enjoy the feast. some days it helps to remind myself that with most things, i'm on schedule. i don't know that i will ever not strive for something more. something different. the act of striving helps me grow as a person. become a little wiser, more understanding, kinder, or just plain to-the-point. whatever the reason, doesn't matter. so long as it takes me where i need to go.

one day, when they write the history of today, should there ever be a history of today, i do not think we as a people will be judged well. our collective choice to be inactive about the salient issues of the day is rather sad. though huge cultural issues like abuse and harassment are gaining recognition, short term gains will quite often be stifled. on TV, the internet, we see actual lives being snuffed out. mostly black lives. and I no longer know how to cope with my feelings. i am not a liberal person, so I do not believe it is my internalized white guilt. ball players who openly take a knee during the national anthem to protest what amounts to modern day lynching, and now the conversation is about disrespecting a song? Sadly, i've come to believe that money equals power, and that in the world of politics, money will always decide the ultimate fate for the rest of us. when did the wealthy get to decide it is time to break our backs? and why do we collectively allow this?

lately i've begun spending a bit more money to have a bike messenger deliver me healthy (well, sometimes healthy) food so that I will stop ordering groceries that only get thrown away when I don't cook. the temperature i set the AC, the type of lighting i choose, bringing a shopping bag. what i choose to recycle or to throw away. every day i have to remind myself to take only as much as i need and leave the rest. wasting food. wasting resources. we are collectively wasting our future based on the idea that we might be missing out if we choose to sacrifice. the worry that someone who needs are greater than ours might be taking something away from us that we might want. privilege and greed are equal in mendacity to political correctness and marketing good works as a way to sell a brand. all the bullshit we say and do to feel superior to one another. whatever side one falls within the political argument, can we not all agree that we are, in some measure, fucking up everything for the future? green is a journey, right?

we can choose to create the world we desire, and it often begins with the little things. moments that change the course of the day. every morning after sarah and I have caught up, the stylists begin arriving. i'm not a morning person but i love it when they stop at the top of the staircase and call down "good morning", even on the really shitty days. in these moments, these little considerate kindnesses, the day arrives for me. no matter what comes next, it is that first connection that carries the day. it may seem small or insignificant to them, but to me it is everything. often i have been accused me of being rigid (which means it is most likely true), structure allows for spontaneity. in the smallest kindnesses of our daily lives, we can begin to grow together. or we can choose not to care. everything we need from our society can only occur if we choose to connect. the beginning of each day is as good a place as any.

Posted on October 19, 2017 .